The Joys of Wearing White Dinkles

Sorry for the delay in posting, but I have been quite busy. Here's what I've been up to:


My great-uncle passed away a couple weeks ago, so I went down to Hillsboro, Illinois for the funeral. The trip was very enjoyable, considering the circumstances. I had a chance to talk to my mom and aunt on the eight hour ride down there. I met some of my relatives when I went to their house for a huge dinner. I had to opportunity to look at scrapbooks and learn about the uncle I really never knew. He was always quiet when I knew him, but I learned that he lived a great life and was even in WWII for five years. At the funeral, naturally, everyone was crying. Ray Brown was their husband, father, friend- they were mourning over the lost. I too was crying, but instead of being tears of sorrow, they were tears of regret. I often think about the times that I said, "Bye, Ray" when I could have taken a few more steps and given him a hug and said, "I love you". It has really made me think about the people in my life right now and how much I take them for granted sometimes. I need to take those extra steps and show them how important they are to me.

Anyway...

On to Champion Cheerleading Camp!! YEAH!




This year my team went to BEAST CAMP(Ya, BEASTLY WOMEN). This is suppose to be harder than regular camp- you learn more cheers in a shorter amount of time and work a lot harder with everything. It was fun. There is this group called Pride that comes every year and all the girls go crazy because there are a few boys in the group and that's all the contact they have with the opposite sex for *gasp* FOUR DAYS(sorry, but don't you think that's a little ridiculous). There are also seminars(I went to Christian Athlete) and lots of team bonding time. For me, this was the hardest part of camp. I feel like a loner on my cheer team. It's really hard for me to be myself with those girls. I don't feel accepted. I try to get to know them-ask them questions, but it seems like they just don't care. I am open about my faith and I feel that's what is holding me back from being accepted. This girl calls me "Holy Sarah"- she doesn't mean it to be rude that's just her personality. I feel honored that they see I am different, but it's so hard to be the outcast. This is something I've never really experienced before. One day I stayed in my room during one of our breaks, listening to my CD, trying to hold back the tears and I started to write:

Sitting alone in my room
No one seems to care
They dance and laugh
While I fight back the tears

I'm crying out for acceptance
Can't you see the pain in my eyes?
I want to dance and laugh
Without having to look at your stares

I try hard to be your friend
To show you who I really am
Will you talk to me?
Will you take the time?

Sometimes I feel like this around people. I feel like I have to own up to my label of "the Christian Girl" or "Holy Sarah". It can be really tough for me sometimes because I am constantly critiquing every one of moves to make sure people see me- as a person and a follower of Christ. I want to show them that I'm not the boring, stereotypical Christian, but I am different than most girls. This is something I've been struggling with lately.


Next is...

Marching Band!




We started our practices this week in preparation for the Coast Guard Parade on Saturday. It's so nice not being a Rookie this year. I know everything that's going on-no surprises. The flute section has 6 rookies this year. It's fun to help them. They're all nervous about memorizing music and marching while playing at the same time. We've just been encouraging them and helping them out as much as possible because we know how nervous we were as rookies. I can wait for band camp though. I get to help out with rookie pranks this year!! It's going to be hard to be away for a whole week though. I have to miss Bible Study, another week of church, part of Unity, and doing stuff with my church buddies. Last year, I called my mom while she was at Unity and I got hear some songs from her cell phone. I'll have to do that again this year. It should be a fun week though. I'm excited to start Marching Band again. Disney World Trip is this year!!

So that's what I've been up to. Sorry for the long post, but I feel incomplete unless I say everything that's on my mind. I'll leave you with these words:

I don't really want to cry over issues
Wet tissues stick to my shoes

paravillintiniay
dorga orpha dorga billa
dorga orpha stifaleare
dorga orpha dorga billa
tonalation fonamere